Traditionally a funeral was considered the best way to say goodbye to a loved one. Typically held in a church or a funeral home and consisting of a formal layout. Many people dress in black, sing hymns, a religious reading may be read and it is a time to mourn and grieve a loved one. However in recent years there has been a movement away from a “mourning” type ceremony into “celebratory” style ceremony. This is what is known as a “celebration of life”.
A Quick Overview Of A Celebration Of Life
A celebration of life is a memorial service for a deceased loved one. The main difference a celebration of life has over a traditional memorial service is the idea of the service being a celebration.
Rather than focusing on what has been lost, the main intent becomes celebrating the qualities, personality and character of the deceased. Focusing on the positive impact they had on the lives of those around them.
A celebration of life ceremony focuses on expressing the joy the deceased brought to those around them and remembering the happiness they engendered in life to their friends and family members. This may involve sharing stories, music, dancing to their favourite songs or even telling their favourite jokes. It is a service that celebrates what made the deceased them!
But what exactly happens at a celebration of life vs. a traditional funeral?
What Happens At a Celebration of Life?
There is no set format to a celebration of life. Celebration of Life parties can be organised exactly how the family would like. Things like location, food, music and even the attire can be picked depending on what the deceased would of loved.
Locations To Hold A Celebration of Life Ceremony
A celebration of life does not have to be in a church or a funeral home. It can be held anywhere. Here are some unique ideas on where you could hold a celebration of life party for a loved one.
A Beach
It is common for people to gather at the beach to say farewell to a loved one. Whether you decided to release some biodegradable balloons, go for a sea swim, surf, build sandcastles or just sit and reflect on your loved ones life a beach can be a great location for a celebration of life.
Beaches and the background noise of crashing waves can be a therapeutic way to reflect on a loved ones life, the happiness they brought to everyone and celebrate the things the loved in life.
The Park
Gathering family and friends for a picnic can be a great way to host a celebration of life party. Parks are often joyful places with ponds, nature walks and generally have a light hearted atmosphere. This location alone can create a celebratory atmosphere for a loved ones celebration of life party.
If your loved ones was known for games you could organise a egg and spoon race, sack races or some tag football games. Incorporating these type of activities into the day can remember a loved one through play. It brings friends and family together in a way that reflects on the joyful & playful nature of a person. These types of events could even become a yearly occurrence.
Garden Parties
If you would prefer a more quiet and private location then gardens can be the perfect place for a celebration of life ceremony. Gardens provide the privacy of your own home and allow a small number of people to gather together. This allows people to share stories, sing songs, play music and talk about the memories of your loved one.
Garden parties can easily be hosted with a BBQ or a small buffet. This more relaxed setting is the perfect way to throw a celebration of life party. It gets everyone mingling and talking. Sharing stories and memories. Overall creating a relaxed atmosphere where people have the space to reflect on the deceased.
Decorations for a Celebration of Life
As celebration of life ceremonies are meant to be joyful then decorating with bunting, ribbons, balloons and candles is acceptable. While these decorations would rarely be seen at a traditional funeral this is what separates a funeral from a celebration of life.
Celebrations of Life should celebrate the life of a person. When we host parties that celebrate – such as birthdays, weddings, graduations. Color is always involved. This is why adding color and celebratory decor to a deceased celebration of life is perfectly acceptable & encouraged.
Music For A Celebration of Life Party
The music chosen for a celebration of life ceremony should reflect the deceased. This means picking music that they enjoyed listening too. Some ways to do this at a celebration of life party could be on a CD player, hiring a band, encouraging people to get up and sing or even getting a DJ.
If the deceased was a lover of karaoke, then incorporating a karaoke machine into the celebration of life is a great way to inject your loved ones personality. Get guests involved in singing your loved ones favourite songs. This is a great way to create an atmosphere that makes the deceased feel part of the celebration.
Serving Food at a Celebration of Life
Food at a celebration of life is dependent on location or the type of ceremony you would like to create.
If you want a small and intimate gathering then booking a table at your loved ones favourite restaurant could be a great idea.
Hosting a garden party with a BBQ or buffet could work perfectly.
If you are having a celebration of life at a park then asking everyone to bring a picnic food could create the perfect picnic.
Potlucks are also very popular for celebrations of life.
Whatever food you decide to serve it should be easy and informal. Finger foods work great as it allows everyone to grab what they want and mingle together.
Other things to add to a Celebration of Life
Some families include symbolic gestures as part of the celebration of life. These can be meaningful ways to get friends and family together to remember the deceased. Here are some examples:
- Releasing Balloons or Lanterns: Releasing balloons into the sky or lanterns into the water is a symbolic act of letting go and honoring the deceased.
- Planting a Tree: Planting a tree or flowers at the venue of the celebration symbolizes growth and the continuation of life.
- Candle Lighting: Lighting candles during the event serves as a quiet tribute to the deceased. Some choose to light candles in their memory at the start of the celebration or at specific moments during the event.
- Tying ribbons to a memory tree: This could be a tree in your garden or one you are going to plant. Everyone can write a happy memory of the deceased on a card and then tie it to a memory tree.
Creating a Celebration of Life
There are many differences between celebrations of life vs. funerals. It is important to choose the ceremony that feels right for you and your family. If the deceased was known as “the life and soul of the party” or always hated formal gatherings then a celebration of life could be the perfect alternative.
A celebration of life does not need to replace the traditional types of memorial services. It could even can be an addition. If your family would prefer to have a traditional ceremony first and then host a celebration of life at a later date. This is also perfectly fine. The way you decide to honor your loved one is you and your families choice. There is no right or wrong and you should only do what feels right for the deceased.
Traditional Funeral vs Celebration of Life
While traditional funerals are a great way to honor the life of a loved one due to their nature they often hold onto a lot of sadness and grief. They are very formal. Held in churches or funeral home. Guests dress in black, offer formal condolences, shake your hand and overall make the day feel very heavy.
Celebration of Life ceremonies remove this formality and instead bring people together in a new light. A celebratory light. People are often encouraged to wear bright clothing. A Celebration of Life can be held anywhere. Instead of sharing sad stories many people share happy or funny stories. Upbeat music is often played and they day feels very much like a celebration.
As mentioned above there is no right or wrong when it comes to the way you decide to say goodbye to your loved one. However there are some additional ways funerals vs celebrations of life can help with grief.
Which one should you choose?
This is only a choice you can make. When making these decisions it is important to think of the deceased and how they would of liked to be remembered. Some people in life may have prefered a traditional funeral. Others a celebration.
While Celebrations of Life are not traditional and may feel like you are making light of a person’s death. For many it is a way to think of them in life and not in death. It can be the perfect way to honor a person’s death. Especially if they were often known as “the life and soul of a party”.
Celebration Of Life VS Traditional Funerals
While funerals tend to follow a specific ritualistic or religious structure, a celebration of life allows more freedom in how to honor the deceased. The focus is not on rituals or somber observances but on reflecting the person’s individuality and celebrating their life. A funeral is often associated with grief, mourning, and loss, whereas a celebration of life serves as a joyful and uplifting tribute.
Personalizing a Celebration Of Life Party
There are many ways to personalize a celebration of life party. When trying to decide what you should add think about the deceased and what they loved. May they loved art, singing or sports. Adding these types of activities can be a great way to honor a loved ones memory.
1. Photo Booths and Guest Books
Setting up a photo booth with props or a guest book for people to write down their memories can make the event interactive. These small touches allow guests to share their feelings and ensure that the event captures a variety of perspectives on the deceased’s life.
2. Custom Memorial Jewelry
For those who want to take something tangible home from the event, consider offering custom-made memorial jewelry. This could include pendants, bracelets, or rings made from the deceased’s ashes or engraved with a significant message or date.
3. Adding Games
If your loved one loved playing games consider adding these to the ceremony. These could be sports or games like charrads. Getting family and friends involved in a game can be a great way to great a fun and celebratory atmosphere while also honoring your loved ones memory.
4. Commemorative Merchandise
To provide guests with a lasting memory, consider creating commemorative items such as T-shirts, mugs, or keychains that feature the deceased’s name, favorite quote, or a meaningful image. These can act as both a tribute and a way to keep the memory alive.
5. Art & Crafts
If the deceased loved art then you could incorporate this into the day. Provide guests with paint and easels and ask them to paint something the deceased loved. Create space on a garden wall and ask guests to paint a message to the deceased. Provide craft supplies and ask people to try and create something that reminds them of the deceased. These types of activities bring people together and sharing memories of the deceased in a happy and loving light.
The Emotional Impact of Celebrating Life
While grief is a natural and essential part of the process after a loss, a celebration of life offers an opportunity to focus on the positive aspects of the person’s life. It is a space where people can feel connected, supported, and even uplifted as they reflect on the deceased’s life. Sharing fond memories, laughter, and joy can bring closure, help individuals process their emotions, and allow for healing.
Planning a celebration of life is a deeply personal and meaningful way to honor the memory of a loved one. By focusing on their life, achievements, and the impact they made on others, a celebration of life offers a unique opportunity for healing, reflection and gratitude. The event can take on a variety of forms, but its purpose remains the same: to celebrate the person’s journey and the joy they brought to the world.
By creating an event that reflects their individuality, you not only give tribute to their life but also offer those who loved them a chance to celebrate, mourn, and remember in a way that is deeply personal and healing.
